I Knew My Stature

I knew my stature when I was a shrinking violet

wilting wallflower

hangdog hanging in the corner of the gym

stewing in the stench of pubescent sweat

and hurricanic hormonal surges

a bit too fleet of mind

and broad of hip

to be asked to dance.

I knew my stature when I was a shriveling teen

angularly angling

for acceptance in the seat of those size 4 jeans

gaunt of cheek and lean on ease

I nibbled on the knowledge

skinny girls get dated

while I wasted \wishing\ away.

I knew my stature when I was a curvaceous coed

unholstering my sexuality

like the black market weapon it was

filed down and ripe for the bidding

overpowered and unequipped for battled

shooting myself in the foot

greenhorn that I was.

I knew my stature when I was a birthing Bessie

nursing \wet and dry\

bequeather of sustenance and succor

repository of binkies, hugs and tissues

beneath notice as an independent woman

selling my soul for a closed bathroom door.

I knew my stature when I strode that shore

clove in rhythm

with the seething tides

shedding the skin

of a thousand judging serpents

one with the wilding waves

as they sing my siren song.

 

• Inspired by Kindra M. Austin’s ‘I Knew My Worth‘, and Kristiana Reed’s ‘I Knew My Mistakes.’ and Christine Ray’s ‘I Knew My Name’   and Eric Syrdal’s I Knew My Heart

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